Failure?

by Michele Boy | April 29, 2021

How do you handle failure?

Honestly, I am terrible at it. I spent years with the belief that I was no good versus my decisions were bad. And never once did I see that it was learning experiences. I just saw all the bad and it was mounting. In case no one told you that attitude is toxic. Staring at your failures without seeing the lessons just breeds self hatred.

I grew up running. Running from bad decisions, moving from place to place, and never learning that you don’t grow without roots.

When I met my husband I learned we stand. We stick through tough times and we grow for it.

“If you want something you’ve never had you’ve got to do something you’ve never done”. (While some attribute this quote to Thomas Jefferson, this doesn’t seem to be in any writings of his).

I spent last Saturday feeling like I was in way over my head. I entered my daughter in a livestock show that later, friends shared was a very big deal, one of the biggest shows of the year.

I watched others who had greater animals with better equipment and most importantly better knowledge!

I questioned myself and watched my daughter finish the day questioning whether she wanted to do this again.

But after packing up and getting on the road I asked her what her favorite things of the day were. The first thing she said was showing. (Her livestock)

We came home unloaded and went to bed. I laid there thinking about if I did the right thing or not taking her to a show like that.

I clearly didn’t know enough and didn’t do things I should have been to help her.

After a good night sleep I woke up feeling stronger. Like we had been through a battle and won which makes little sense since we basically got slaughtered.

But they say if you want to be better you need to get around better competition. Well we certainly did that.

There were a couple concepts I tried to teach her but it took being at this show for her to truly grasp. We now see the areas we are lacking.

So was the first show of the season a success or failure?

We showed up, we learned, and we kept our heads held high. And we fought through and didn’t quit.  I would say those are good qualities

My husband says there is a lot of value in losing big.

I won’t lie. I have tried to run from hard things most of my life. I can’t even tell you how great it feels to stand in our failure and not run off. And to realize there isn’t failing at all unless you give up completely.