Gratitude and Change

by Michele Boy | April 18, 2024

I am writing this as the western Kansas winds blow and gust. The trees shake. I hear the howling which makes it sound colder than it is.
I am about to leave for a couple days to a publishing conference in Colorado Springs. I am leaving my family midweek to figure it all out on their own. Okay I may have left a couple of schedules, mentioned a few important things several times, and have a friend on backup in case something happens. LOL.
I am getting out of my comfort zone and I am the first to admit I am struggling with it. 
New and different can be fun but it can also be scary. My list of what ifs is keeping me up at night. 
But it is time. I went to my daughter's last elementary school concert. Her life is busy with school, cheerleading practice, 4-H meetings, piano lessons, and more! 
Me leaving for a couple of days isn't the same as it once was. Now it is time for me to branch out just a little. 
What will these couple of days look like? Will I enjoy being with new people? Will I get anything out of the conference? 
I guess if I come away with one thing then I was successful. 
The pastor at church on Sunday asked us what did we take away from the sermon?
I heard gratitude. Maybe things hurt when I walk, but I can still walk. Maybe I am not the weight I want to be but I still have clothes to wear.  
And while I am still trying to improve my health, I am able to function. 
Yes I have goals of what I would like. But what is the point if you can't enjoy the today, the right now?
So as I head out on a solo drive, I think about how I haven't done this in years. And how much I love being a mom. I love our barn full of sheep. I love being married and living in western Kansas. 
I have even grown to love the wind. The noise soothes me and is comforting. No, I don't love the dirt blowing. But I will find something to be grateful for. 
Fast forward - Here I sit in my hotel room finishing up my work to send the paper to print. I am surprised at how much I am relishing the silence. I sat at the hotel hot tub for 30 minutes without a sound just quiet. No schedules to wrangle or adjust. It was peaceful. 
Then my family FaceTimed me from the barn and I was so happy. 
As I finish this up on before I leave for the conference I have new worries, concerns. Will there be a lot of people? Is this the right conference for me? My mind can go on and on. 
Getting uncomfortable does that. 
Funny how the first analogy that comes to my mind is farming. It’s usually song lyrics. If you till up the ground, some old mixes with new. Things get stirred up. And it’s change. 
So what are you thinking about now? What are you grateful for? Have any life changes happening? Is it time to make some? 
It’s early Wednesday morning as I finish this up. This afternoon my daughter has cheerleading tryouts. I won’t be there after to give her a hug and tell her I’m proud of her for trying something new. Change. 
Maybe gratitude is the secret to handling changes. It can be a constant when the world around you keeps changing. 
I saw a great saying that I will end this with. “No amount of regret can change the past. No amount of anxiety can change the future. Any amount of gratitude will change the present."