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Ride the Waves

I have been thinking about how I want my daughter to live this life. I want her to pursue her passions and be herself regardless of others opinions. But I also want her able to ride the waves of the world easier than I have. 
My husband has that even temper I want for her. Nothing gets to him. Whatever you do, get upset at, are happy about, has nothing to do with him. If you are frustrated with him, he considers what’s his, owns it and moves on. And I’m jealous. 
I have huge ups and huge downs. I am emotional. I read the room. I check in with people’s emotions and adjust myself accordingly. Or I hold myself back because I don’t want to cause more drama. In short I am trying to be like him. But I am not him. And he didn’t marry me to be him. He married me for me.
I have learned a ton from him and grown to let a lot of things go that I realize are unimportant in my journey. But there is a lot I don’t let go of - a lot of moods, if I am tired angry frustrated, they all show. But joy, excitement and happiness do too. I do not have a poker face. You can read how I feel from a mile away. 
This past week I have had some incredible highs and some frustrating lows.  If I spend my time comparing myself to my husband I will have failed because he would slide through the highs and the lows with ease. 
  When I told him I felt off, he responded isn’t that what you live? You always tell me you love to feel the highs and the lows. 
Well maybe I am changing because too high and I get paranoid and uncomfortable, too low and I worry I am on the wrong path in life. But even feels strange too. 
I want to feel the rain on my face. I want to feel the accolades of hard work. I want to feel the trust of good friends who have my back. 
But. There’s always a but. That feeling of a high means I have to feel the low. 
To be honest,  I have had them all this week- great highs great lows and for the first time it feels uncomfortable. 
I put myself in the spotlight and that means I am open to more criticism - both real and imaginary. You have no idea how crazy my thoughts can go. 
If I laid low then I wouldn’t go through it. 
But that isn’t who I am. The choice is mine. Lay low and even, or be wild and open. Both have consequences. Sitting here writing this I realize I like being different and unique. My husband likes it too. 
At the upper elementary school concert Tuesday night (that will be covered in next week’s paper), I watched something incredible. I saw the music teacher listen to her students and create magic. It was if she was a paint brush and each child was a different color of paint. She grabbed each color, mixed and matched, and let them shine. She didn’t worry about the rules. She allowed herself and the students to become. 
That’s what I want - to be free from worry of criticism and to be myself. When I try to fit in someone else’s box I become less me. Don’t get me wrong sometimes there is a place for less me. Lol!  I get that. 
But sometimes letting you not like me is ok too. Working on that part. 
God didn’t create me to be you or you to be me. He has one of you already. The trap I fall into is admiring who you are and wanting to be more like you. And while I can gain a lot of wisdom by watching others, it is becoming myself that I need to be comfortable with. 
To all of you out there, I admire you greatly for some things and get frustrated at you for others. 
 When I was a kid my dad taught me to ride the waves in the ocean. Big waves weren’t scary because I learned how to navigate them. As I sit here thinking about the waves of the highs and lows of this week, I am smiling. Instead of fighting it, I am making a choice to ride the waves. 
The lyrics from Pearl Jam’s song Release comes to me now - “I am myself, like you somehow
I’ll ride the wave where it takes me.”
Yes I guess that’s what I want for my daughter too. How can I ask her to be herself if I can’t be it too.

OPINIONS

You Matter

At the funeral of a friend’s father this week, the priest said something that has stuck with me. So often at funerals I think the focus is on the glory of Heaven and what joy there is. But it is rare we stop and discuss the emptiness that is left behind.  During his... [More]

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Please or Thank you

I am home from State Fair. A little excited, a little behind, a little tired, and a little sore. I walked almost eight miles  the first day. I feel like that is worth noting. To all the show parents out there, I see you.  When I got back, a few situations arose with... [More]

Helping Others

Here we are in September. I thought the summer flew by. Well, hang onto your hats,  I feel like this week I was strapped into a rollercoaster speeding down the track. It’s not all bad but it is crazy.   We spent a couple hours helping sort cattle this weekend... [More]

Lay Down or Get Up and Fight

Here we are at the end of August. School is underway, the first home high school football game is tomorrow. Fall is in the air. It’s just an expression as temperatures are predicted to be in the upper 90s.   I haven’t slept much lately. In the wee hours... [More]

Keep Moving

A former owner and editor of the newspaper dropped by my office the other day. She is beautiful, smart, fun, and so vibrant.  We talked about her life. She is busy. She is active. She is involved in her church, in her community, in having fun, and keeping active.  It... [More]

Remember Who You Are

Last week there was a New York Times article about farming in Syracuse Kansas.  I read it and was impressed. The writing surpassed anything I am capable of at this time. It bruised my ego a bit. My confidence was taken down a couple notches.    I took a breath... [More]

Make Good Choices

I’m writing this on my way to one last sheep show midweek before school starts here. At 5:30 AM we were on the road. For those who know me that is a rare occurrence.  The air is cool. The sunrise is beautiful and I wonder why I don’t take the time to enjoy these... [More]

Suffering

The pastor on Sunday mentioned suffering is good. Or I think I heard that. I was after fair tired and wanted some refreshment. But it turned out it was what I needed to hear. Sometimes suffering pushes us to do more.  For the sake of small town and the public not knowing... [More]

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SPORTS

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STATE GOLF RESULTS

State golf on Monday had the Varsity Bulldogs miss playing in the finals as a team by one stroke. They finished seventh out of twelve teams.  On Day 1, Brody Keller shot a 92 missing day two by two strokes. Ian Brummett shot a 95, Mason Scott  and Johnny TeVelde shot... [More]

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JH BASKETBALL WINS

Junior High Boys Basketball A, B, and C teams travelled to Elkhart on Monday, November 21. The A team won 41-34, B team won 26-21, and  C team lost to Elkhart 13-20. Head Coach Vance Keller said, “Elkhart was a tough win for both the A and B teams but both grinded... [More]

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LADY BULLDOGS BORDER WARS CHAMPIONS!!

The Lady Bulldogs were undefeated during the Border Wars, defeating Eads on Friday, 42-7 and Walsh on Saturday 62-5, bringing their record to 3-1. But the winner wasn’t announced until Tuesday evening. Syracuse Athletic Director Josh Johnson explained, “It came down... [More]

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JH Basketball Season Underway with JH Boys sweeping Lakin

Monday night at home at the Herndon Gym, the Junior High boys swept Lakin! Head coach Vance Keller said, “We’re a young team with only six eighth graders and 12 seventh graders. We’ve had six total that started the season with injuries so we haven’t had... [More]

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Senior Night Volleyball

Three Syracuse High School volleyball seniors were honored on Tuesday, October 5, during the volleyball tournament at Syracuse.  Kaetlin Thomeczek, daughter of Joe and Dami Thomeczek has played volleyball since the third grade, playing with Syracuse Youth Activities Association... [More]

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HS Track

Head coach Steve Navarro said, “The coaching staff has really enjoyed working with this group of kids this year. They have been putting in hard work despite some less than stellar conditions for practice and meets. We are excited to see what they can do now that we are... [More]

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SHS SPORTS WRAP UP

Baseball: The Bulldogs faced the Goodland Cowboys at home on Thursday, April 8, losing game one, 2-22 and game two, 1-17. Head Coach Dustin Doze said the Bulldogs really struggled throwing strikes again and they had too many errors. We need to clean things up if we want to... [More]

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Spring Sports Start

One year ago, athletes and coaches were beginning practice for their spring sport, some practicing during spring break, others enjoying the break from school. Soon they found out their break was extended a week, some with great joy, others with apprehension. Then came the unfortunate... [More]

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NEWS

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AFTER 47 YEARS OF SERVICE, COUNTY FIRE CHIEF RETIRES

Last Thursday, the Hamilton County Fire Department held their Fireman’s Appreciation Dinner. County Fire Chief Ed Baker and four other firefighters retired.  Years of service awards were announced and those recognized were Ed Baker  who has served Hamilton... [More]

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LOCAL 4-H YOUTH PLACE AT KANSAS STATE FAIR

The 2023 Kansas State Fair began September 8 and continues through September 17, 2023. If you are headed there this weekend, you may want to check out the 4-H building where many local 4-H youth will have their work on display.  To be eligible to take non animal exhibits... [More]

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SHS CROSS COUNTRY AND GOLF KICK OFF WITH MEDALISTS

 Fall sports are in full swing and Bulldog fans had an opportunity to cheer on cross country, golf, cheer, junior high and high school volleyball and football, all in the same week.   Junior high and high school cross country travelled to Goodland Thursday August 31,... [More]

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Gould Runs With The Bulls

How did you spend your summer? Swimming and bicycling? Working?  For Syracuse High School Senior Jay Gould, he took the opportunity of a lifetime. He explored Spain for five weeks with foreign exchange student Inigo Moral. Moral hails from Valladolid, Spain. Last year, the... [More]

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HB2350

Pictured L to R - Carlos Huato, Antonio Banda, Sally Catlett, Griselda Sigala, Erica Rodriguez, Frank Garcia, Shelby Hernandez/photo by Michele Boy

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SIMON ENDS GYMNASTICS CAREER WITH NO REGRETS

Stella Simon wakes each morning in her bedroom to a wall of trophies, medals, and ribbons. Fourteen All-Around Champion trophies, 193 medals, and 6 ribbons. There is more if you count participation trophies and All-Around medals.  The Syracuse Journal has been following... [More]

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CLARE DUNN PERFORMS BENEFIT CONCERT FOR DUVALLS

Country singer Clare Dunn will headline a benefit concert at the Prowers County Fairgrounds Arena on Saturday, September 2nd to help with recovery efforts after an EF-3 tornado destroyed the home of John and Myrna DuVall.  Dunn who grew up in Two Buttes has plenty of Syracuse... [More]

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1971 SHS GRAD RETIRES FROM NURSING CAREER

1971 SHS graduate, Grace (Boy) Donecker, retired from a 32 year career in nursing, but the path was not a straight one. “I was never going to be a nurse. I hated needles!” Grace grew up just south of Syracuse where Dave and Jenny Schwieterman live. Gordon and Lois... [More]

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OBITUARIES

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James G. Brucker

A Memorial Service for Syracuse, Kansas resident, Jim Brucker will be held at 10:00 a.m., Friday, September 22, 2023 at the First United Methodist Church in Syracuse.  Pastor Larry Alexander will officiate. James G. Brucker, known to most as Brucker, was born June 27,... [More]

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Timothy J. "Tim" Haslett

Timothy J. “Tim” Haslett, 75, of Syracuse, Kansas, passed away at home (after a fall) on September 13, 2023. Tim was born September 26, 1947, in Dodge City, Kansas. He was the oldest of seven children born to Floyd B. and Magdalene (Stegman) Haslett. Tim was a farm... [More]

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Patricia Berniece Tyler

Patricia Berniece Tyler of Denison, Texas, passed away on September 7, 2023, at the age of 82. She was born on November 3, 1940, in Cairo, Kansas, to Albert Alexander and Lois Aletha (Wilson) Clark. Patricia had a caring and nurturing spirit. She loved working as a nurse and... [More]

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Robert “Bobby” Nelson Moore

Robert "Bobby" Nelson Moore, 56, of Seward County, Kansas passed away in the early morning hours of Saturday, September 2, 2023, at Northwest Texas Hospital in Amarillo, TX Bobby was born in Waynoka, Oklahoma on July 5, 1967, and was lovingly adopted by Jackson Nelson Moore... [More]

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Kerri Lonnberg

A Memorial Service for Kerri Lonnberg will be held Friday, September 8, 2023 at 2:00 p.m. at the Holly School with Pastor Kathy Leathers officiating. Kerri Lynn Lonnberg departed this life September 1, 2023 in Denver, Colorado at the age of 44.  She was born August 1,... [More]

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Marvin (Babe) E. Graber

Marvin (Babe) E. Graber passed away August 31, 2023 at the age of 89 at the Hamilton County Hospital in Syracuse, Kansas. Marvin was born at his family home in Kendall, Kansas on March 20, 1934. He was the youngest of six siblings born to John and Carrie Graber. Marvin graduated... [More]

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David F. Wagner

A Memorial Service for Coolidge, Kansas resident, David Wagner will be held Saturday, September 2, 2023 at 10:00 a.m. at Valley Memorial Funeral Chapel in Holly, Colorado. Inurnment will take place at a later date.  Per David’s request cremation has taken place and... [More]

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Dr. Leo Russell Finkenbinder

Dr. Leo Russell Finkenbinder, beloved husband, father, grandfather, great-grandfather, brother, uncle, university professor, and biologist passed away on August 8, 2023.  His memorial service will be held on Monday, August 28, 2023, at 10:00am.  Bethany First Church... [More]

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