Pollyanna

by Michele Boy | July 20, 2023

It’s Wednesday morning. It’s the county fair sheep show. And I am trying to write this in the middle of getting my daughter ready, sheep ready, and finishing the newspaper.  My husband is in the middle of farming, an extremely late wheat harvest, and helping get sheep ready. 
Rain is coming. Wheat is in the field. And somewhere someone has a gripe. 
People accuse me of being a Pollyanna when it comes to situations and people, seeing only the rosy side. My family would laugh at that. 
In truth I grew up as a victim, blaming everyone for my horrible no good choices. My self absorbed attitude, believing everyone was out to get me, sent me into a Great Depression and I fell apart. 
It was only after a great deal of therapy that I started to make better choices. And it wasn’t overnight that I saw changes. 
If it took you a lifetime to create the mess it will take quite a lot to climb out of it. 
So maybe I try to see the best because the selfishness and victimhood didn’t serve me. In a sense that is selfish. 
So yes I will go out of my way to ease someone else’s burden. I will get shot down. I will get hurt. And I will probably be used. But one day when they lower me into the ground I want to feel happy and proud that I did what I could to make the world a better place. 
Do I want my child to win? Yes. Do I want to fulfill my dreams? Yes. 
This week I got a big blow to my ego. I could have blamed others but instead I matured enough to say Ow! And then move on. 
 Joyce Meyer, a television preacher, once said, “I am not where I am supposed to be but thank God I’m not where I used to be.”
Some people will try to discredit the source do that quote. But for me I will take what I need and leave the rest. 
How about you? 
Are you further than you were when you started this journey?
The world seems to get uglier in some ways. And I have no control over that. 
The control I have is my attitude and my decisions. 
 I won’t lie. My daughter is showing sheep in less than an hour, and that is where my heart truly is right now.
I pray all her hard work pays off. 
And I hope our choices and decisions help others to strive for better, the same way others do for me.
Who do you surround yourself with? What choices do you make to create what you hope for?
Once upon a time I decided to go after what I want at any cost. It led to tragic consequences and shaped me forever. 
So I will pray that my choices will be good ones. I pray that I will offer to help when I can, and hope that someone out there is praying the same joy for me as I am for them.
Too Pollyanna? Ok. I choose to try to find the good. Because the other way didn’t work well for me.
So in a sense that is me being pretty damn selfish.
Sending good vibes to you all!
Wish us luck!