I went to bed Tuesday night happy about life and the peace that comes from checking things off your list, helping someone, and having a plan for the next day.
I had a dream that night, I was in a hotel room and it caught fire. Wednesday morning I woke up to pure chaos. There was water in my basement but not sure where it was coming from. I had a situation at my office. And there was a lot of work to still do on the newspaper that was unavoidable due to some other issues. Suddenly I felt like I was drowning.
Ever have that feeling?
We all go through it. It didn’t seem like there was time to catch my breath. Isn’t it easy to look at someone else falling apart and judge them?
How do we act when it’s all going to, as my daughter would say, H-E- double hockey sticks?
My first thought is how grateful I am nothing that happened was tragic. And that most of my days are not this frustrating.
Lately I feel like I am behind. The list is bigger than me of things to do and I can’t catch up. I wonder will there be a moment soon to just sit by a pool, read a book , and feel the sun on my face?
Even as I write this, the paper isn’t finished. But all week I have had the feeling of just keep putting one foot in front of the other. You will know what to do next.
But in the middle of it, I am questioning myself.
Did I do something wrong? Why is this happening?
I get a “Message from God” email every so often. It is a group I enjoy following. The message was - “Doubt is the rust of life. That doubt holds you landlocked in paralysis unable to move. The time you spent doubting is the time you are not alive. So, rid yourself of the doubt, take that step one way or another, your heart knows what is best.”
This morning I don’t have time to doubt, question, or pursue dreams. This morning is dedicated to completing the tasks at hand. One foot in front of the other.
After I get this paper out I need to go clean the water out of my basement and figure out where it is coming from.
Now that I think about it, we have had some smaller issues with water in the house but they were so tiny we just ignored them and went on with our lives. Maybe the issue had to get big enough for us to pay attention to it.
How about you?
Does life feel overwhelming? If you look too far ahead or at the mountain in front of you, does it make you excited or want to run away and hide?
I read the bible verse - Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” - Matthew 19:26
It’s true. I feel like all of this is impossible. Yet if I look back, God has brought me through much harder times.
Honestly these are tiny problems that I have built up in my head as more than they really are.
Maybe I just need to take a moment and stop. Catch my breath. Remember all the good things God has brought me to and what He has helped me through.
Look around. There is good somewhere.
And maybe all the turmoil is pushing you toward something new.
Is it happening to you or for you?
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